Hetalia and Atheism
by bisimcat13
Summary: This is America's struggle through time spiritually with history and how he deals with the backlash of being an atheist. Also most people in the 18th and 19th centurie had any info about atheism if any at all since freedom of religion was still a radical subject. (don't quote me on that I didn't research a thing.) Also I don't own Hetalia or any of it's characters only the plot.
**Just a disclaimer at this point that I don't own Hetalia or any of the characters, the only thing that is mine is the story line in this fanfiction. Also I am personally accepting of all religions people I meet are in while I am an Atheist, so I am sorry if I say something triggering. Now on with the story.**

 **July 31, 1740**

 **Dear Journal,**

Hi Journal, since England has went away for a bit he sent me you, telling me that I'm at a good age to start writing down my feelings so I will. First I should tell you a

bit about myself, My name is America, though to most I'm Alfred Kirkland. One thing I know about myself is that I was founded on religious freedom, people of lots of

different forms of christianity live here. I just finished my lessons on reading,writing, math, and other stuff from the tutors I had and I'm so glad! As a gift I just got

this from England I miss him and hope he will return soon, though this will help distract me from his absence. Plus it will give me an opportunity to practice my skills!

I will try and write in you as often as I can about the world so you can know just as much as me. Like you should know today it is so nice out, a nice breeze and not a

cloud in the sky, starting this outside was a very good idea. Actually this reminds me of some of the stuff from the bible that England taught me about God, that he

created everything here and that I should thank him for all the wonderful things I see and hear. Though I find it kinda silly to talk to something you can't see, but I

am thankful about the weather, and England is right all the time. So I will have to stop writing in you to pray and maybe after I can play with some of the kids, much

fun. I must go now then so I promise to write in you later.

Love,

Alfred Kirkland

* * *

 **Time skip to right before the Civil War**

 **Dear Journal,**

Just recently I was looking back through you and so many things have changed since the beggining. More change is coming though, I know that much, but I don't

what exactly. Though maybe something about slavery I hope, I want these conflicts over slavery to stop, at least for a while. The headaches that come with even

thinking about the issue are becoming worse and worse and I don't know how much more I can take. I can see both sides and trying to choose one is literally very

painful to think about at all. These debates are going deeper and deeper into people's personal beliefs and forcing those who were once neutral to choose a side in the

whole mess. It's times like this I wonder what side god would be on, and if I knew would it be best to follow him. There is arguments both for and against slavery in

Christian texts, it's like the bible is a walking contradiction to me at this point. God help America, because by the time this mess ends, I will need a lot of wiskey.

Now turning away from that subject (my headache's getting worse), there is a possibly darker matter to discuss. Otherwise known as myself. Ever since the War of

1812 I've had to discuise myself. From what I've found other countries try to take down the ones that could take them down and at this point it's happneing to me.

To survive I'll have to put on a show, of ignorance, to keep my power and possibly get more. Don't worry about in here though, I will always be myself in my writing,

to keep me centered writing is probably the best option. Though to other people from now on they will only see a confident, loud, self-proclaimed hero, who can't read

the mood. Perhaps when it's more safe I will show my true self to others, but I don't know how long it will take, though you will be the first to know when I decide.

Now I must go take some of the herbs in my garden the headache is coming back, so until the next I write.

Goodbye,

Alfred F. Jones

* * *

 **The middle of the Civil War**

 **Dear Journal,**

I know I haven't written in a while but with this war going on I've grown very sick and have had barely any time to think let alone write. I'm am grateful for this rare

moment of clarity during the whole thing though, it gives me time to collect my thoughts and talk a bit with Abe. I'm glad that I have Abe as boss, he helps me the

best he can and doesn't force me to work while I'm sick (like some others have). His kindness does help ease some of the pain with the knowledge that there are still

good people out there like him. Maybe god is giving me at least one good thing in the middle of this mess, hope, one of the few things I have left with this much pain.

Though I doubt that god is trying to help me, maybe he's just trying to keep me from going numb of all the pain I'm experiencing. If this is true than who knows. My

prayer's aren't doing good either, I don't know why people pray anyway, god already has a set plan and some praying won't change a thing of that. On an even worse

note, England is still staying neutral through all of this, brushing this off as just another civil war. The thing England doesn't see is that the civil wars' in his country

were about gaining power mostly, this one is about an idea. I wonder what will happen when he figures it out? For now sorry if this entry is to short, I feel the

moment of clarity faiding so I must go. Until next time,

Alfred F. Jones

* * *

 **Now that's the first chapter and I hoped you enjoyed. Also you should know that for the most part America has good experiences with religion and doesn't even think about Atheism until around the 1950's. Even after that he is in denial but it becomes harder as more science explains more stuff. Also I don't know if this will be a slash yet and if so with who, but I can tell you it won't happen until later in the fic. This chapter for the most part was to establish America's P.O.V. and to also say that not all atheists had a bad experience with religion. Me included. We just don't believe there is a god out there. Also England's status during the American Civil war was pretty rude seeing as England had no idea how painful it could be to have your people dividing be the cause of a civil war so couldn't understand the pain. One does not just forget about a thing like that so I'm betting the grudge is probably still with America for a long time.**


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